NO CrossFit – No Problem

No CrossFit No Problem

I’m supposed to be writing a post about my Murph experience. That will just have to wait. I’m fired up right now. I’ve seen that “Why I Don’t Do CrossFit” article shared one too many times. I’ve seen one too many haters on social media bashing my passion when I know damn well they have never dropped a bead of sweat inside a CrossFit box. When I had to engineer piping system designs in the past, I placed relief valves in the system to open and vent when the system pressure got too high. This is my relief valve.

Hey, you, come a little closer. A little more. Yeah that’s good. I want to tell you something important, something you need to know. Here it is…

I don’t care if you don’t CrossFit.

Did you get that? Let me say it again.


I do not care if CrossFit is not for you. That’s awesome. Do you have another form of fitness you love? I’m legitimately happy for you! Like running marathons? Sweet. Is that for me? Nope. Am I going to bash you for it? Nope. Am I going to create a social media account dedicated to spewing venomous hate towards your 26.2 miles? Nope. In fact, let me help all those haters out right here. Check out this natural way of losing weight.

You can get hurt doing CrossFit!

Yes you can! You can get hurt pretty bad! You can mess yourself up doing a weight that is too heavy for you. Loaded barbells dropping throughout the box can be a hazard if you aren’t careful. Try doing high repetitions of kipping pull-ups without the prerequisite strength to do a strict pull-up can damage your rotator cuffs big time.

 I guess we should stick to doing “normal” stuff like running (shin splints, rolled ankles, cracked heel bones, serious dehydration, poisonous snakebite as you’re running) or low intensity globo gym work like bench presses. No one ever gets hurt doing a bench press, right? Ever heard of Stafon Johnson? If the name sounds familiar, he’s the USC running back who was seriously injured doing a bench press.

Johnson was performing a “bench press” lift with what doctors were told was 275 pounds when the bar apparently slipped from his hand and landed on his throat. USC officials said an assistant strength and conditioning coach was working with Johnson as a “spotter” when the accident happened, but he was unable to stop the bar from injuring the player.

Gosh. Hey Erin Simmons, I sure hope they don’t do bench presses at Florida State. I hope that, in the 5 years you were at Florida State University working out with a 3 time back-to-back national championship team, never once were you asked to do a bench press by one of your strength coaches.

People, you can get hurt doing any form of physical activity. You sign a waiver with ANY training you do, be it a sporting event or signing up for a gym membership. There are risks inherent with any type of training. That’s why trainers and coaches get paid! Which reminds me…

Holy hell, no way! You mean there could be one bad egg out of a whole chicken coup? Wow. Let’s go on a CrossFit witch hunt! I mean CrossFit coaching has to be the only profession with bad apples, right? Surely there are no dishonest accountants (Enron), no football players who allegedly commit murder, no greasy slime ball attorneys who get child molesters off scot-free, no trainers who would allow an athlete to ever push past the point of exhaustion into a potentially compromising condition or allow an athlete to use bad form… surely there are ZERO bicep curls done when a dude arches his back to complete a rep, surely that NEVER happens.

It’s important that any athlete in any sport be educated enough to be able to tell if a coach is full of shit or not.

Yes, there are some poor CrossFit coaches. It’s true. But before you cast the first stone, remember there are poor coaches in every profession. It’s important that any athlete in any sport be educated enough to be able to tell if a coach is full of shit or not. Is your coach on his phone while you work out instead of watching you? Ok, chances are he is a lousy coach. Use common sense, people. If you want to meet quintessential good CrossFit coaches, come to my box CrossFit 865.

Can you “get certified in a weekend?” Well, the course itself lasts a weekend. But you have to study beforehand. You have to have a working knowledge of exercise and kinesiology and motivational techniques. You can’t go from nothing to proficient in a weekend. The fact that Erin or anyone else would state this is preposterous. The exam to become a Professional Engineer is only 8 hours long. That’s shorter than the weekend of CrossFit certification. OMG! CrossFit coaches are trained more than engineers! Quick, tell everyone you know to never cross a bridge again — they are dangerous! All bridges are dangerous!!

CrossFit is a cult!

You’re damn right it is! Look up the definition of cult. CrossFitters DO care about what they do a lot. We ARE very dedicated to our passion. If that’s wrong, then I don’t want to be right! I LOVE my CrossFit family. There is no more supportive, more highly motivated group of people that I’ve ever met. Go to a college football game and see all the ugliness from opposing fans. Curses, derogatory names, threats of physical violence, all are very present. Go to a CrossFit competition and watch everyone cheer for each other. It’s that simple. CrossFit is love, people. If you want to hate on love, I guess you’ve told me everything I need to know about you.

Look, I don’t care if you don’t CrossFit. I don’t want to only do CrossFit. I want to golf and swim and hike and yes, sometimes run. We aren’t meant to sit around in a chair or on the couch all day.

Physical fitness is so directly related to life longevity and overall health that you can’t possibly make a case that it isn’t. I don’t think I’m alone when I say that I don’t care if you don’t CrossFit. I’m happy for whatever fitness you find. I hope you love whatever fitness you find.

Going to the gym shouldn’t be a chore. Going for a walk/run shouldn’t require a sigh and a huff and puff to get dressed and do it. Humans were born being fit. Our primal nature craves to sweat.

 Let’s be clear about one thing: There is no reason to hate another form of fitness. There just isn’t. There’s also no reason to publish articles or support articles by sharing them when the author clearly a) is not an expert on the subject; b) has an agenda s/he is pushing, c) states “facts” that are clearly not true or are simply the author’s opinion. You can share the same beliefs as the author, just try not to perpetuate hatred and misinformation.

I hope everyone is happy being active in a way that they love. I love CrossFit. I truly hope you will respect that, as I respect whatever you do. If you have questions about fitness activities, ask someone truly knowledgable instead of relying on someone who is “trying to get into fitness modeling.”

/pressure relieved

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